Creative online dating names
” until I eventually answered, explaining that I was seeing someone but wished him well. His periscope dropped down below the waves, never to resurface again. In 2016, I referred to this episode ghosting, but the internet recently furnished a more precise term: submarining, or the sudden vanishing of a romantic prospect who just as suddenly reappears at some future date, cresting huge and unannounced and without mention of the intervening silence, as if they’d never disappeared at all.
Submarining is just the latest in a series of freshly spawned dating “trends:” There’s breadcrumbing, or maintaining a person’s interest by occasionally throwing them communication scraps that suggest some kind of intention; there’s stashing, or deliberately cloistering a new partner away from friends, family, and social media, as a means of keeping the relationship informal and non-exclusive; there’s cushioning, or the low-key lining up of several alternative partners as a sort of insurance against the dissolution of a new relationship.
Moira Weigel, author of Labor of Love: The Invention of Dating, warns against romanticizing previous generations’ courtship practices.
Dating has long had a way of bringing out the worst in people.
A pool of your thought peers probably includes people who have encountered the same “particular kinds of creatures” in the wild, and so you develop a common language to describe them.
While it’s possible that assigning pet names to bad behaviors might make them feel more common and less abjectly rude, there’s also something unifying and joyful in crafting hashtaggable labels—especially for women.
“Try being a gay man in the 50s; try being an interracial couple; try being a divorced woman.” That nostalgia is often wrong.“Everyone has always complained about dating,” she adds, nodding to the agony aunt columns (anonymous, advice-seeking Dear Abby letters) of yore that detailed evergreen complaints from women who’d had it up to their spit curls with the cads of the day.It’s a lot more uncomfortable that way.” Technology, however, affords impunity.Most people prefer not to break bad news in person—according to a 2013 Pew Research Center report, even before Tinder became ubiquitous, one in six Americans had dumped a partner over text, email, or online message—and if you asked any octogenarian about their dating days, many would be able to dredge up some stories about heartbreak and romantic fuckery.Sherman and Grace both agree that apps like Tinder can be wonderful tools for introducing people who would never have met otherwise.Still, daters these days are overwhelmed with choice.
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I once passed the better part of a summer waiting for a spark to ignite with a guy whose feelings for me were mostly inscrutable, while mine never warmed above tepid.